Sunday, August 23, 2009

Just off

Now I am past the slightly scary exacerbation, with its very temporary double vision. I am working five days a week. Not much time for my life, but there you have it.

My days involve some three hours commute, and 7 1/2 hours working in less than wonderful conditions. My whole way of getting through is to simply repeat " I don't care " constantly to myself.

When I was a teenager, I worked in factories in some pretty nasty conditions. Always, the way I made it through was by telling myself I could put up with anything temporarily.

So I guess the next 5-7 years will be full of my mantra, and the knowledge that it is all temporary. Perhaps with the economy improving, the 401K will improve, and there will be jobs closer to home.

Boy, I am hoping that for everybody.

pb

5 comments:

Miss Chris said...

Glad you are feeling better. And wow. That's one heck of a commute you have. Ugh!

pb said...

My only fear is that my 11-12 hour days will trump my ability to "not care" anymore.

Long days were the mark of the very first attack, in 1995. I was working two jobs, each parttime but local, and putting in long days.

Of course the finely distilled stress of this job will eventually trump the mess caused in 1995. Let's hope that the current exacerbation is caused by the summer.

Denver Refashionista said...

Sorry about the job.

Andrew K Fletcher said...

Have you been following the inclined therapy threads on thisisms forum? http://www.thisisms.com/ftopic-6755-days0-orderasc-0.html http://www.thisisms.com/ftopic-8535-225.html

pb said...

In case you were wondering: I do check my sites occasionally. This comment caught my attention because I couldn't figure for the life of me what thisisms were. I used to study religion, and I have a passing acquaintance with just about every -ism there could be.

This is ms hadn't occurred to me. These days I have no time to think about, let alone take care of, the condition. My work difficulties will all be over in eleven months, since I am targeted for termination. Then once again I will be able to control my life and health.

pb