This week a thought is percolating through my subconscious: people who need incontinent pads should gladly use them.
A friend is fighting his need for Depends. I understand but do not approve. Incontinence affects others. My coworkers are supportive (Note: I’m not exempt from being busted about it!). This is not license to head home every time I have an accident. It does, however, give me permission to run home should I use up my supplies. No questions asked, and no explanations offered. It’s great.
My friend relies on his partner to help him when he’s caught off guard. And this is very inconvenient for them both. For said partner, this is a reflection of his devotion. A love offering, freely given. That is good, maybe even holy.
And yet. My friend insists he does not need “diapers.” He is a grown man, he bellows. Well, I was a grown woman ten years ago, and I think I still am. My partner has better things to do than potty me in some very nearly public places and situations. Not when protection enables us to hurry to the nearest facilities.
I asked his partner to deliver a message: Get over it and get some Depends. The sooner you do, the sooner it will become routine and bearable. It did for me; it will for you. Both.